A dream not yet realized.....

Lately I've been thinking that there has to be more to this life than eating, sleeping, working and paying bills. I have no idea what I've been put on this earth for but I know whatever it is, it has to be more than just simply maintaining and getting by in life. I'm envious of those people who know exactly what they want out of life and just go for it. Their whole life is just about following their dreams. I don't have a dream. Whoever heard of a person that doesn't have dreams?

People dream of becoming doctors, lawyers, astronauts, singers, actors, writers, teachers, world travelers, artists - all kinds of things. I can't remember ever have those types of dreams. If I had one I feel like I had a purpose, a goal - something to strive to achieve.

I have however come to one realization just recently - if I ever had the opportunity to work for myself I would. I'm not sure what I would do, but I do know that I don't want to continue to slave away for an employer for a few measly pennies.

I want to pick up some new hobbies. Maybe this way I can find out what I really enjoy doing and turn it into a career. I'd like to take a creative writing class this summer, swimming lessons, and since I have all of these vacation days, a few short weekend trips this summer either with friends or by myself.

One of the first trips that I will most likely be taking by myself is in June to Atlanta. There's this big natural hair show there where there will be lots of shows, vendors and seminars. While there, I'd like to take a seminar on basic locking, braiding and one on making your own aromatherapy blends for profit and marketing. While there I'd also like to explore Atlanta and do a little shopping.

I'd also like to go to Miami and/or California with Mandy sometime this summer. I'm working out at the gym constantly to get my body beach ready. I'll probably also visit Charleston which would probably be another solo trip.

I'd really like to start making extra payments on my Saturn so I can get it paid off sooner. The sooner I get that paid off, the sooner I can really think about getting my own place with an extra $250 in my pocket.

I'd really like to take the next few months to kind of find myself and to keep myself out of a depression. Working out helps some with the blues but it's not a total cure. I want to be able to learn how to be okay with myself also. And I'd like to starting dating more - nothing serious - but I just want be be able to have fun with someone without obessing or over analyzing relationships.

I'd also plan to make it a point to post more in my bloggs. I've discovered that writing about my feelings and getting my issues out is very therapeutic so you can plan on seeing much more of me.

Now I am off to fix me lunch and then it's straight to the gym.